Murakami's Running Book

Introduction

Last night, I finished my reading of the book, “What I talk about when I talk about Running” by Murakami. It is a memoir, according to the author. However, I believe it is more non-fiction than a memoir. The experiences he shares are things I have experienced myself in the past year since I was bit by the bug called Cycling.

A Sense of Nothing

Murakami writes along the lines of:

No matter where you are, long-distance runners always have the same focused expressions. They appear to be deep in thought as they run, even if they might not be thinking about anything specific. It’s impressive that they’re all running in such intense heat. But then again, so am I.

This is true for cycling, I think deep when cycling my favourite route, that I named as Physiker-Radweg. The name takes inspiration from Philosophenweg in the mountains of Heidelberg, where romantics and philosophers take a hike to be lost in the forest, mountains, time itself. So, I named my usual relaxing route as a physicist’s Cycling Path in German. However, after the ride is done, I don’t remember most of what happened during the ride. I have to check my Garmin’s recording to see how I did during the ride. During the ride, you suffer the gruelling pain if you are doing threshold efforts, but the body has the amazing way to remember the pain - because it doesn’t remember the pain. You are left with the beautiful views you have encountered on your way.

The above sensation is very similar to the Buddhist philosophy, shunyavada - literal translation is an argument for zero or nullness. It is a state of mind where there are almost no thoughts, completely blank and empty, and you feel one with the bike. Me and the bike aren’t different parts, we are the same and the bike is an extended body to me. This makes the act of cycling more streamlined to myself and doesn’t make it as something I have to do. It turns into breathing; we don’t focus on breathing most of the time, we can, but we do not. Cycling can have such an effect during those intense thoughts. Sometimes, I just stop, take my phone out and record what I am thinking.

There is also another philosophical thought by Shankara’s school, called mayavada, in literal terms argument for illusion. Murakami writes something along those lines as well:

“Nothing in the real world is as beautiful as the illusions of a person about to lose consciousness.”

These are topics of Existentialism and Absurdism if you are more interested in Western Philosophy. The context of the above quote from the book is when he is running an ultramarathon.

I have done 100-128KM long single cycling rides, around 60% mark, I was questioning my life choices; I am suffering. I ignore my body’s pleas and carry on. After some time, all of this is gone. I am still riding, with more energy than before, and I am flying through the road, overtaking cars once in a while. Murakami talks about such a barrier being passed as well during his ultramarathon. It is staggering how a memoir can talk to another person on a deep level.

Schedules

There are two instances where Murakami talks about scheduling. One is his daily routine, in that he does his important work in the morning and goes to bed early. I used to be like that and my life was much simpler. After my part-time job, my regularity of the schedules dwindled and there was no order to my life. A lot of things started falling apart.

Cycling became my lifeline for the falling apart parts of my life. I feel depressed; I go for a ride. Feeling stressed, go for a ride. After the ride, I am refreshed (mentally, of course; physically I am a stinking pile of garbage). I can solve one problem at a time after that. The overwhelming sense disappears. I can think clearly, solve the problems, and proceed on. Apparently, Murakami uses running as his lifeline for a busy schedule for himself. There is a part where he says, even 2 of himself can’t possibly get all the things done that need done.

Alone or Lonely?

Being alone, the solitude, is what appeals to a lot of thinkers. I am not classifying myself to be a brilliant thinker. However, to study theoretical physics, you kinda need some decent level of thinking and visualization going on inside your head to actually do it. You can feel lonely in the presence of 100 people, which is why I just step out of most parties. There is not one soul that can connect on a personal level that can cheer you up. Murakami explains this as:

Emotional hurt is the price a person has to pay in order to be independent.

I like to be independent, that encloses me to well up all emotional troubles to myself. There is no one who would listen to me, not judge, be compassionate and understanding of my troubles and help me face them. There may be one or two I know, but I can’t bother them because they are themselves in their own problems to be bothered.

PS: As I am writing this section, I am listening to “That’s the way it is” by Celine Dion in the background. Quite apt to the thoughts I am having as I write this section.

3 Disciplines to Success Growth

Murakami explains that talent, focus and endurance are the three disciplines to growth. Talent, I don’t know if we have it or develop it. The other two disciplines, focus and endurance, that can be willed, trained and deployed in our lives. Those may be the only way to move on and grow as a person.

You can learn endurance from running or cycling long distances, for they are endurance sports. Just like the 100KM rides passing the barrier, I believe, in life, any problem has a peak or barrier that you have to hike across to the other side or tunnel through (Quantum Mechanics, if you know, you know). Enduring all that happens to you as you go on is hard work, but if you are tenacious enough, you can get through.

Identity or Exhaustion?

Murakami’s mantra as he is running marathons is:

“I’m not a human. I’m a piece of machinery. I don’t need to feel a thing. Just forge on ahead.”

While I don’t have any mantras like that for cycling, it makes sense on some level. One of the oldest questions in Eastern Philosophy is the Identity of Self, “Who am I?”. Depending on your philosophical inclination, you have variegated answers to that question. Whether any of it is metaphysically accurate, I have given up on, for I don’t enjoy judging. My answer has developed over the period of the last 7 years, and I don’t contemplate on this anymore. Not because I got the perfect answer, It isn’t worth my time anymore, or will it enhance my everyday experiences that I have. Murakami writes:

The end of the race is just a temporary marker without much significance. It’s the same with our lives. Just because there’s an end doesn’t mean existence has meaning. An end point is simply set up as a temporary marker, or perhaps as an indirect metaphor for the fleeting nature of existence. It’s very philosophical—not that at this point I’m thinking how philosophical it is. I just vaguely experience this idea, not with words, but as a physical sensation.

This is true of cycling as well. A lot of philosophical ideas I have pondered upon for hours in the past, I get a glimpse of the experience of what it means when I am cycling. Maybe this is what people call as realization.

Granted, I am sure by now you must have realized that all of this ranting is going to be left without conclusion. If yes, I have done a decent job organizing my thoughts here, else welcome to my thoughts inside my head. This will go on until the marker of Death puts a stop. However, to end this article, let me quote a passage from Murakami’s book:

It’s precisely because of the pain, precisely because we want to overcome that pain, that we can get the feeling, through this process, of really being alive—or at least a partial sense of it. Your quality of experience is based not on standards such as time or ranking, but on finally awakening to an awareness of the fluidity within action itself. If things go well, that is.